Sunday, December 13, 2009
Here's some of the Banquet Manager's favorite comments from readers in the month of November. Thanks for adding your voice to this blog and keep them coming.
On "The World's Rudest Restaurants - Part 1"
Joe Positive said:
"Y'know how sometimes you go into work and just don't feel like being nice to people? I wonder if the staff at the Beacon ever have days when they go in and just don't feel like being jerks? What do they do then? Fake it?"
On "The Dreaded Wedding Breakfast"
"THIS? would effing make me quit on the spot. And not agreeing to pay for all of them? Witch slap - 163 DOES NOT look like 80, sorry...in no way shape or form. I have already told all of our daughters that Bridezillas don't exist in my world so don't pull it and the wedding breakfast? No one needs to be lauded over THAT much. you had your effing wedding, now get the eff out.
I am done with the cursing. TYVM and have a nice day. [this post just made me mad]"
"Ha, you crack me up! This was hilarious. ;)"
On "Don't Blame Me For Putting The Napkins There"
Anonymous said: "Whenever I think of the housekeeping supervisors the Elvis Costello song 'Two Little Hitlers' springs to mind. I remember one who had a googly woogly eye and a monotonic drano damaged voice that always sounded like a sneer. If Marge Simpson's sisters had a long lost triplet..."
On First Hotel in Space
"Weddings in space are a great way to pare down your RSVPs.
DJ plays your songs because of threat of airlock.
Or better: DJ is iPod.
Convenor can't fly back without paying bill.
The guarantee is real for a change.
A/V tech support is a bitch.
Get tired of guests asking if the Tang is real.
Freeze dried ice cream is way easy to serve.
Entree: Beef Jerky. Would you like original, teriyaki or peppered?
Walk-in freezer is way below zero for sure.
Wedding dress must change to jump-suit for zero gravity dancing or 'Hoo-Wah!'
Everyone can see their house from here.
Breakfast buffet features powdered toast, bacon bits, dried fruit and eggo's.
Alcohol substituted for ecstasy, cocaine, mushrooms and cannabis to save payload.
No more forgetting to light the candles. Forgot to switch on the LEDs instead.
Whaddya mean we don't get grats on the room rental!
Staff don't get space payday flu.
Annoying invitations that say we're getting married on stardate...
The Vulcans might actually be Vulcans.
Alien jumps out of cake and eats best man."
This was too good, I had to post the whole thing. Thanks "Dance Dance", ugh, I mean anonymous.
On That Damm Waiter Keeps Taking Away My Drink
"Hahaha this is hilarious. I especially like the last guy's reaction. This is not quite what waiter extraordinaire means when he blogs about clearing the table to get people to pay the check, but it is a funny, exaggerated version of this concept.
On Thanksgiving and the Walk-in 14 Top
"I just stumbled on your blog, but please oh please, post the complaint letter when it comes in! You can't possibly leave your readers wondering what lovely vitrol will be oozing out of it."
On 15 Interesting Food Facts
"I could have sworn that I've eaten more than 28 pigs just in the past 10 years or so! The chocolate stat doesn't much surprise me, though I just don't enjoy a lot of it myself anymore - maybe it's just that I overdid it growing up... I am kinda fat at the moment lol."
On Sweet 16 and the Girl With Mono
"Rarely did sweet sixteen parties. I do remember a trend among young girls. If one asked for a vegetarian meal suddenly they were all vegetarian."
On Where Was That Dollar Bill Yesterday That You Got For a Tip Today
Ann Martin Photography said:
"OMG, thats a thought I could have lived without!"
On Our Last Wedding For The Year, Horay
Waiter Extraordinare said:
"I will meet you in about 15 minutes at the pub around the corner!"