Monday, February 25, 2013

I'm Back From Retirement...And I Wrote a Book!

After almost 2 years away from this blog it was about time I came back.  Came back to the many wonderful and loyal readers that supported me over the 3 years that I was actively writing story after story about what it's really like to be a banquet manager.

Well, over the quiet month of January, my mind started to wander and I was missing putting my thoughts down on paper.  So I decided to write a book.  What the heck, if "they" can do it why can't I?

So I wrote a book entitled:

"Earn More Tips On Your Very Next Shift...Even If You're a Bad Waiter".

Now I know what you may be saying, "Not another book about how waiters can make bigger tips". There have been hundreds of books written on the topic and thousands of articles on the web about the same thing.  Well yes, you're right.

But in doing my research for this book I didn't see one single book or article that cared if the hotel or restaurant where these waiters worked were also able to improve their customer service.  Only that the waiters make bigger tips.

As you know, customer service is big with me and I've complained about poor waiter service enough times on this blog.  So now I decided to do something about it.

Waiters: In this book you will learn:
  • My "Magical Table Greeting" that will put your customers at ease from the moment they first meet you.
  • The proper way to check back on your guests' satisfaction.  And no, you don't say "Is everything ok"?
  • Why you don't recommend a food item to your customer, and what may happen if you do.
  • Why you must serve the kids first.
  • Why you want to be the weakest server in the restaurant.
  • Why your table is not full of "guys".
  • How to use food substitutions to your advantage, and get a BIGGER tip.
  • How to make your busboy want to take care of your customers as much as you do, maybe even more!
  • Why you need to know where the nearest bookstore is. (This one creates the WOW factor)
  • How to be an expert at opening a bottle of wine table-side.
  • How to create the "memory".
  • The best way to say goodbye to your guests.
  • And much more!

In this book you will learn:

  • Why you must care that your servers earn BIG tips!
  • What NOT to teach your staff.
  • That each chapter of this book can be used as short training sessions at your daily/weekly stand-up meetings.
  • How to create great working relationships between the various positions of your restaurant.
  • Why you must "empower" your staff and trust their judgement since they are the front-line of your business.
  • How to get the Chef on your side and to try some special side dishes, and how this leads to very happy repeat customers.
  • Why you must teach your staff to "assume the sale" and why this benefits all involved.
  • How to create the mindset of customer service.
  • And much more!
***To purchase the book directly from Amazon click on the "Buy the Book" sign above or 
on the Amazon ad at the top right of the page.

I hope you will like the book.  And if you don't mind...please tell all your waiter friends about it.  Hope they will like it too. 

So I say goodbye for now and know we will meet again. 

Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

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Friday, July 22, 2011

My Final Post

Well after 3 years and 370 posts, I must say farewell to this blog and the people that have been my faithful readers.

It's just that after all these years, its getting harder finding the time to sit down at my computer and tell you what it's like to be a banquet manager.

I never wanted to rehash an old story, or make up something that didn't happen, just to find some words to post on this blog.   That's not my style.

I want to thank all of you that have supported this blog over these years and took the time to post a comment.   
A special thank you goes out to the fellow hotel managers and servers/bartenders that have linked their blogs to mine.

The additional readers that have come here because of this are too many to count.  I only hope that you too have attained many new readers that have come from here to your sites.

Because of your support, we reached many milestones too.  This blog received some awards and many of my posts have been copied and posted on other blogs (hey, shouldn't I be paid for that?).

But what I'm most surprised at, is that this site is still ranked 1st of any site on the web for the search term "banquet manager".  We're still number 1 on Google, Yahoo, Bing and Aol. Kinda cool right?

In closing, thank you all for using some of YOUR precious time and stopping by to read the latest from my world.  It's appreciated more than you know.

Take care...

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Thursday, May 19, 2011

It's National Waiter and Waitress Day, Again!

…are they kidding?
This is a great country for so many more reasons than I could ever name, especially here. We celebrate political, religious, cultural and sexual diversity in every form. We even go so far as to name a “special day” after various types of people to remember and commemorate them.

We have the normal days:
  • Presidents Day
  • Mothers Day
  • Fathers Day
  • Grandparents Day
  • D-Day
  • Independence Day
  • Flag Day
  • All Saints Day
  • Veterans Day
  • Thanksgiving Day
  • New Years Day

Then we have the “cute” days:
  • Groundhog’s Day
  • Girl Scout Day
  • April Fools Day
  • Administrative Professionals Day (give me a break!)
  • Beautician’s Day
  • Take Your Son or Daughter to Work Day
  • Forgot Day (I forgot that one)
  • Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Day
  • National S’mores Day
  • Left Hander’s Day
Now guess what the brain trust of the country came up with?
Drum roll please………..

The National Waiter and Waitress Day! (May 21)

WHAT! You have got to be kidding!

I have an idea for a day to celebrate waiters and waitresses. How about a few of these winners:

  • Get your butt to work on time day
  • Wear a clean uniform day
  • Take off those gangster earrings day
  • Get the order correct day
  • Don’t let the buffet run out of food day
  • Serve from the left and clear from the right day
  • Offer them a second cup of coffee day
  • Stop complaining day
  • Do your closing side-work before you go home day
  • Punch-out for your shift day
I can go on forever…

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Saturday, May 7, 2011

Now I Gotta Call More People In For This Shit!

We have a large social church group in today that ends at 5pm tonight.  That's great 'cause it gives me plenty of time to flip the ballroom for Mother's Day tomorrow.  

I have my housemen all set with tomorrow's floor plan since we closed-out the seating and it should be an easy flip.

A few minutes ago that fabulous "Sales Chick" comes by, yes she's here this early today, and says that the social group today wants to delay the start of the the event by 1 hour to give them more time to get back here from the church. Now since I know the history of this group since they have been here 2 times before and that really means 2 hours not one.

Then when we try to get them outta the room it takes another hour or so 'cause they move as slow as shit.

Bottom line is that I know they won't be outta the ballroom until around 8pm tonight I can bet the house on this.  So now I need to call my pm housemen and change their call-times or they will be sitting around with nothing to do waiting for these slow-pokes.  Plus I probably will need another guy on as well.

Just the kind of shit I need before Mother's Day...

Enjoy your day with your mom.  Hope she enjoys it too.

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Monday, May 2, 2011

How Many Boxes Do They Have?

I get a call on the radio this morning from my shipping and receiving clerk Paul.  He seems kinda pissed and tells me I need to come down to the loading dock to see all the boxes that are coming in.  

I sort of expected a shipment coming in today for the big pharmaceutical group that is starting tomorrow for a 4 day meeting.  But I wasn't expecting all THIS shit!

There's 87 friggin' boxes, yes I said 87 boxes that are being unloaded from a special UPS truck that was sent here just for this shipment.  WTF!

There's logo pens, special pads, folders with the company name on it, and even different colored Post-it notes with their newest drug logo plastered across the top. The loading dock looked like the back of Costco or Sam's Club.

I call up to the Sales Chick, of course I gotta blast her for this, to ask her what's the plan for this crap.  Apparently Sales Chick didn't want to come down to see what we had 'cause she didn't want an earful from me.  After 10 minutes she finally arrived.

"How's all these boxes supposed to get to the ballroom", I ask her?  "Are we expected to be their personal UPS delivery men"?, came next.  "I'm not responsible for moving all this crap upstairs, they gotta help too".

Sales chick just stood there with those deer-in-the-headlights eyeballs.  For once she didn't have a smart-ass comeback.  "I didn't know anything about this Banquet Manager", she pleaded.  "I'm sorry, they never mentioned all this".

Guess I'm getting soft 'cause I kinda believed her.  

Now my men are moving all this shit up to the ballroom for tomorrow's meeting.  This sucks...

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Thursday, April 28, 2011

Like I've Got Time for Another Meeting

Apparently the boss has forgot what "operations" is like.  I guess when you get so removed from the day-to-day tasks of running a department you think that everybody else has all the time to sit through another friggin' meeting.
We have the:

  • BEO meeting (2 times a week)- to discuss the upcoming events (and where I terrorize the Sales Chick)
  • F&B meeting (weekly) - to hear the F&B Director bitch about how high our food cost is
  • Accounting meeting (2 times a month) - to listen to those pencil-pushers complain how we didn't make the banquet checks correctly
  • Budget meeting - with the GM (thankfully this is only once a month)
  • Final detail meeting (with the upcoming brides) - this is torturous, can't take listening to their worrying anymore about wanting their special day to be so different from the rest of the brides in the world.  BITE ME!
Now I need to take part of a new meeting called the "Property Assessment Meeting".  WTF is this?

I'm not in the maintenance or engineering departments, that's their problem.  They need to make sure that this place is in tip top shape not me!  I send them the emails and fill out the maintenance request forms when the lightbulbs are burnt out of there is a tear in the wallpaper.

Why do I need to sit through another meeting for this shit!

Just drives me nuts...

Who's gonna take care of the customers?  Who's gonna make the schedule?  Who's gonna order do payroll?  Who's gonna...

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Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Football Player Sexually Abuses Waitress

Updated Apr 27, 2011 5:42 AM ET


Washington Redskins defensive lineman Albert Haynesworth was charged Tuesday with misdemeanor sexual abuse, accused of fondling a server in a hotel restaurant in Washington.
A grand jury returned an indictment formally charging Haynesworth in the alleged incident at a downtown Washington hotel in the early hours of Feb. 13. If convicted, the 29-year-old two-time All-Pro faces up to six months days in jail and a fine of up to $1,000.

According to the U.S. attorney's office, the government's evidence shows Haynesworth slid a credit card down the front of the server's dress and fondled her breast.

Telephone and email messages left for Haynesworth's agent, Chad Speck, were not immediately returned. At the time the server's accusations became public, Speck said "there seems to be no truth to these allegations."

Redskins spokesman Tony Wyllie said the team referred all calls to Haynesworth and his agent.

Link to original story.

From the Banquet Manager:

"She should have kicked him in the nuts".  
Fellow waitresses/waiters, ever had to deal with shit like this?

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